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Edwardian Love Story:
Postcards of Montague Prosser Chaffey and Miss Lilian Tye Colin Lindzey All postcards are courtesy Colin Lindzey and Michael Cook August 2017 Are you courting? If you are old enough you will remember the phrase from Wilfred Pickles' 1950s radio show Have a Go on the Light Programme. If you are younger, you might not even know what courting means (a relationship prior to an engagement for marriage). The show ran from 1946 until 1967 with twenty million listeners a week as couples tried to win £1.19s.11d by sharing personal details about their partner. But it harked back to an earlier time, the interwar period in rural England, and that is the setting for this article. This is the story of the courtship of Montague Prosser Chaffey (known as Prosser) and his sweetheart Miss Lilian Tye in the years just before the First World War. They had both been brought up in Box, Prosser with his parents at Bull's Lane, and Lilian Tye, the daughter of Albert Tye, with hers at The Barton, Ashley. |
Mutual Relationship
We will never know when the couple met and how their relationship began. We might imagine that the families knew each other and the couple were of similar ages. We can see that their affection was mutual and was supported by their siblings and other family members. The earliest cards were about 1905 when they were both 19 but they appear to have been courting before that. By July 1905, Prosser was sufficiently confident to put off a visit to Lilian until the 4 o'clock train in order that he could go to a Quoit match at Middlehill.
Both parties were extremely cautious about the content of their cards which would be read by local post officials, their parents and their employers before the recipient. Sometimes a crossing out was exaggerated by "XXXX" as an indication of unspoken affection. Some cards weren't sent through the post but enclosed in envelopes to ensure privacy. It was a symbolic declaration of intimacy but not necessarily of love or romance, as the undated Christmas card below left just deals with Prosser's cold and failure to make an assignation.
We will never know when the couple met and how their relationship began. We might imagine that the families knew each other and the couple were of similar ages. We can see that their affection was mutual and was supported by their siblings and other family members. The earliest cards were about 1905 when they were both 19 but they appear to have been courting before that. By July 1905, Prosser was sufficiently confident to put off a visit to Lilian until the 4 o'clock train in order that he could go to a Quoit match at Middlehill.
Both parties were extremely cautious about the content of their cards which would be read by local post officials, their parents and their employers before the recipient. Sometimes a crossing out was exaggerated by "XXXX" as an indication of unspoken affection. Some cards weren't sent through the post but enclosed in envelopes to ensure privacy. It was a symbolic declaration of intimacy but not necessarily of love or romance, as the undated Christmas card below left just deals with Prosser's cold and failure to make an assignation.
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We can see how lonely Prosser was whilst working away from home and we get the picture of a shy, home-loving, young man, deeply in love with his first and only girl friend. We can all empathise with wanting to talk to someone but not having much to say. So it was with most of Prosser's postcards, which often say Hope you are quite well. I am feeling first class. Others start with Just a line to say ... and follow with a weather report or an update on illness, and often ended with will write a letter tomorrow or will write letter Sunday.
Notwithstanding the lack of content, the postcards meant a great deal to Lilian, who kept every one in perfect condition. The major problem communicating by post was the possibility of misunderstanding. In November 1906 Prosser felt obliged to write from Bournemouth (above right): I did not mean to keep it from you. I should have told you when I came back but I thought you would worry.
Notwithstanding the lack of content, the postcards meant a great deal to Lilian, who kept every one in perfect condition. The major problem communicating by post was the possibility of misunderstanding. In November 1906 Prosser felt obliged to write from Bournemouth (above right): I did not mean to keep it from you. I should have told you when I came back but I thought you would worry.
Separated by Work
Theirs was a ten-year courtship with very little ability to contact each other when both were at work except through postcards and letters. Lilian worked very long hours in service as the only domestic servant for the elderly Miss Sarah Vezey at Townsend. As the sister of the owners of the candle factory on Quarry Hill, Miss Vezey was a wealthy but demanding employer and Lilian's free time and privacy was limited.
Some cards were sent from nearby areas and hardly worth sending. The card below was from Trowbridge on Friday 23 February 1906 at 4.30pm with a view of Trowbridge Church and nothing much to say, just the words Dear Lill with love from PC.
Some postcards even were sent from Bulls Lane to Townsend, just round the corner in Box.
Theirs was a ten-year courtship with very little ability to contact each other when both were at work except through postcards and letters. Lilian worked very long hours in service as the only domestic servant for the elderly Miss Sarah Vezey at Townsend. As the sister of the owners of the candle factory on Quarry Hill, Miss Vezey was a wealthy but demanding employer and Lilian's free time and privacy was limited.
Some cards were sent from nearby areas and hardly worth sending. The card below was from Trowbridge on Friday 23 February 1906 at 4.30pm with a view of Trowbridge Church and nothing much to say, just the words Dear Lill with love from PC.
Some postcards even were sent from Bulls Lane to Townsend, just round the corner in Box.
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In the autumn of that year Prosser was sent to Bournemouth to work on a church tower for several months. As a trainee stone mason, he was a journeyman mason working on-site at buildings often a long distance away. In August 1906 he was at Westbourne, Bournemouth, where he was working on the church shown on the postcard below dated 29 October 1906, which was produced by transferring a negative photograph onto lithographic printing plates. The construction work was still in progress in December and he wrote I don't now (know) when we shall be back.
By the summer of 1907 Prosser was working in Abergavenny. Even though it was fairly close to Box, the news of the death of his uncle Charlie came belatedly and as a surprise: I have not heard anythink (sic) ... so I suppose he died sudden.
Then came a spell of work in Truro in February 1909. The job dragged on until spring 1910 and Prosser sent a card showing his accommodation as well as several showing the work he was doing on Truro Cathedral and his fellow workers (below).
Then came a spell of work in Truro in February 1909. The job dragged on until spring 1910 and Prosser sent a card showing his accommodation as well as several showing the work he was doing on Truro Cathedral and his fellow workers (below).
It is difficult to be certain but Prosser appears to be the person third left.
His employment was not always continuous and there are several references to Prosser being out of work in the cards which Lilian received from her sister Cecilie. At times he resorted to taking lower paid local work and in August 1910 was working at The Wharf yard in Box, then unemployed again by December that year. As he obtained more experience, he was sent on more difficult jobs and during 1910 he took employment in Stanley, Wakefield, for an extended period. In April 1911 when he was boarding in Farrington, Berkshire, whilst working at Buckland House, the most splendid Georgian house in the country, according to the historian Nikolaus Pevsner.
Between May 1913 and September 1914 he sent cards from Bridlington and Hull when he was working on Holy Trinity Church, Hull. The work was disrupted by discontent and a strike in May 1914 when, out of the blue, he said The strike is now settled.
I will tell you more when I write next time. In another card he said Their (sic) is about 10 on strike up till now and their is another meeting to night. I think things will soon be alright. Another card at this time said Going on trip to York races Wednesday. Everyone having outings so we are going to have one too. Presumably this restored commercial peace and quiet. In October 1914 he worked in Exeter where he went to the Palace Theatre one evening and won prizes of 7 lb of flour and 14 are (or) 15 tins of potatoes all on a string.
When there was a break in distant jobs Prosser would rush home, sometimes arriving back at 2 am. You can sense the relief in his card and his desperation to get home by travelling throughout the night from Hull, saying I have finished to night so shall be in Bath Sunday morning 20 to 7. Nowadays that separation might have killed off any romance but not then. Even if they had been closer together, the chance to meet up was restricted by Lilian's work in service when time off would have been very limited.
Between May 1913 and September 1914 he sent cards from Bridlington and Hull when he was working on Holy Trinity Church, Hull. The work was disrupted by discontent and a strike in May 1914 when, out of the blue, he said The strike is now settled.
I will tell you more when I write next time. In another card he said Their (sic) is about 10 on strike up till now and their is another meeting to night. I think things will soon be alright. Another card at this time said Going on trip to York races Wednesday. Everyone having outings so we are going to have one too. Presumably this restored commercial peace and quiet. In October 1914 he worked in Exeter where he went to the Palace Theatre one evening and won prizes of 7 lb of flour and 14 are (or) 15 tins of potatoes all on a string.
When there was a break in distant jobs Prosser would rush home, sometimes arriving back at 2 am. You can sense the relief in his card and his desperation to get home by travelling throughout the night from Hull, saying I have finished to night so shall be in Bath Sunday morning 20 to 7. Nowadays that separation might have killed off any romance but not then. Even if they had been closer together, the chance to meet up was restricted by Lilian's work in service when time off would have been very limited.
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Prosser's Postcards
Occasionally Prosser's postcards talk discretely of love. In 1906 some cards speak The Language of Love and of Pure and Ardent Love (seen above), even thugh Prosser's message was a little more prosaic. One card sent after years of courtship in 1913 or 1914 combines Lilian's name and the word Love (see heading photo) but it was only after their marriage in April 1915 that Prosser adopted a pet name for Lilian when he addressed her as Dear Lass.
There are occasional glimpses of humour, albeit purchased printed on the card rather than spontaneously written by Prosser, and even a saucy card. But, by and large, Prosser's cards gave views of the area he was in, the buildings he worked on, and commercial pictures of generalities.
Occasionally Prosser's postcards talk discretely of love. In 1906 some cards speak The Language of Love and of Pure and Ardent Love (seen above), even thugh Prosser's message was a little more prosaic. One card sent after years of courtship in 1913 or 1914 combines Lilian's name and the word Love (see heading photo) but it was only after their marriage in April 1915 that Prosser adopted a pet name for Lilian when he addressed her as Dear Lass.
There are occasional glimpses of humour, albeit purchased printed on the card rather than spontaneously written by Prosser, and even a saucy card. But, by and large, Prosser's cards gave views of the area he was in, the buildings he worked on, and commercial pictures of generalities.
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Visits home were rare and urgent postcards needed to confirm arrival times: In 1907 I shall be coming in by half past two to morrow and in 1909 I am coming home for a day are (or) two Saturday morning.
Lilian kept all Prosser's postcards, most of which were written in pencil with repeated mis-spellings, such as hear for here, no for know and to morrow as two words.
Lilian kept all Prosser's postcards, most of which were written in pencil with repeated mis-spellings, such as hear for here, no for know and to morrow as two words.
Lilian's Postcards
Lilian was freer in her writing than Prosser (perhaps better literacy levels) and happy to set down more thoughts in writing.
But she was limited in movement by her domestic work and unwilling to talk about her employer's friends and relatives.
Above all she had to comply with arrangements preferred by Miss Vezey. In July 1905 she had to change meeting details when she and her employer were in Weymouth: Dear P I shall not be back till Tuesday, so I suppose I shall see you Saturday. And in 1906 I hope you will be at home Sunday as it will be my Sunday out. Even then, considerable discretion was needed: I hope you haven't forgot how to wistle (sic). If you have, you must come up the steps and tap at the window.
Some, like the one below from 1907, had a humorous sentiment, which Prosser rarely expressed: Thought you would like these two. Don't you think they are alright any way up. Obviously bored, she sent another an hour later, It is lovely down here but it is wet this morning. I hope it will clear up presently.
Lilian was freer in her writing than Prosser (perhaps better literacy levels) and happy to set down more thoughts in writing.
But she was limited in movement by her domestic work and unwilling to talk about her employer's friends and relatives.
Above all she had to comply with arrangements preferred by Miss Vezey. In July 1905 she had to change meeting details when she and her employer were in Weymouth: Dear P I shall not be back till Tuesday, so I suppose I shall see you Saturday. And in 1906 I hope you will be at home Sunday as it will be my Sunday out. Even then, considerable discretion was needed: I hope you haven't forgot how to wistle (sic). If you have, you must come up the steps and tap at the window.
Some, like the one below from 1907, had a humorous sentiment, which Prosser rarely expressed: Thought you would like these two. Don't you think they are alright any way up. Obviously bored, she sent another an hour later, It is lovely down here but it is wet this morning. I hope it will clear up presently.
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Many of her cards were send when on holiday with relatives. She wrote in 1908, Dear P I have arrived quite safe and sound (in Banbury), had a nice ride and didn't feel tired. B (sister Bertha) came to meet me. Will write a letter soon. Hope the work will go alright. Don't worry about me, I'm alright here. Will let you know when I am coming back. Much love from Lill, 21 Duke Street, Banbury. There was even a card with nude babies on it for Easter Greetings.
Conclusion
Prosser and Lilian married in April 1915, after ten years of courting. Prosser was 29 years old and Lilian had just had her 30th birthday. Probably married life was very different to their imagined life together. The world had totally altered after the Great War and they moved out of Box for Prosser's work, leaving their families and the existence they had previously thought to be continuous. The happy days of Edwardian Britain didn't continue after the hardships of the Great War and the depression of the 1920s. The age of the great postcard era had come to an end but Lilian and Prosser's marriage lasted for over 50 years.
Prosser and Lilian married in April 1915, after ten years of courting. Prosser was 29 years old and Lilian had just had her 30th birthday. Probably married life was very different to their imagined life together. The world had totally altered after the Great War and they moved out of Box for Prosser's work, leaving their families and the existence they had previously thought to be continuous. The happy days of Edwardian Britain didn't continue after the hardships of the Great War and the depression of the 1920s. The age of the great postcard era had come to an end but Lilian and Prosser's marriage lasted for over 50 years.